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You've had a good portion of the enchilada, but today you get the whole! Week five of the Woot Monkey Games wrapped up four straight weeks of games, with six teams competing during their lunch breaks to see which department would emerge as the grand champion. Who took the honor of being the very first winner of the Monkey Games Cup?

 

 

You'll find the answer and the whole recap inside. But first, here's the names of our winners from the Non-Alcoholic pong event:

1st: FerrisBueller
2nd: Okiedukie
3rd: Nilocc225

Well done to the medal winners! Email your details (name, address, and shirt size) to commissioner@woot.com and they'll get your prize package sorted out. And for all you non-medal participants, we're still impressed. It took great courage to make those videos, and we won't forget how you sacrificed your dignity for the amusement of others. In our non-legally binding heart, you're all winners! It is to you we dedicate these final games, this final week of... The 2011 Woot Monkey Games!

The Woot Monkey Games were designed to be a fun way to help our employees enjoy the scorching month of August, and so far, response has been huge. Every department has gotten involved in the attempt to win glory for the team and a gold-painted Sansa medal for themselves.

 

 

Week Five closed the games with a final push for individual and team medals. Victors displayed the painted Sansas above their desks while others prepared themselves in a final chance to score. Pushing through the horrible Texas heat, our staffletes were using up the last of their reserves, and made a go for the limit on the other side of the horizon made from the inner light in a tiger's eye. If we'd been awarding marbles, these last events would be for all of them. Who was up to the challenge?

DAY EIGHTEEN: THIS BLOWS

 

 

Athletes had a balloon and a few deep breaths. Each participant had to fill their own balloon, then knock off all the cups as quickly as possible. The gold medal went to the athlete with the very best overall time.

 

 

After the games last week, this event proved to be a breath of fresh air. It was also another chance for Ware-A-Shirt to move forward a little. Could it be they just wanted it more? Or was the constant competition starting to wear down the other contestants?

DAY EIGHTEEN WINNERS:
1st: Dan Reyna (Ware-A-Shirt)
2nd: Keegan Carson (The Zookeepers)
3rd: Thomas Miller (The Scarlet Sansas)

TEAM EVENT: B.O.C. RACE

 

 

Much like a standard potato-sack competition. the B.O.C Race required cooperation and rhythm. Contestants had to jump quickly across the field and back, and the first team to reach the finish was declared the winner.

 

 

Despite the 104 degree heat, employees lined up to support their teams. Those athletes who'd mastered the art of working in smaller groups did well, while those "lone wolf" types found the event more challenging. Who says our games aren't teaching management skills?

TEAM EVENT WINNERS:
1st: Money Talks
2nd: The Assets
3rd: Scarlet Sansas

DAY NINETEEN: BUCKY BALLS

A chance to explore the gentler side of our athletes, the Bucky Ball competition was no less demanding. Contestants had a limited time period to design a build a Bucky Ball sculpture, to be judged on creativity, style and beauty.

 

 

 

Although seemingly easy, remember: each athlete was working with a series of magnets powerful enough to rip through pig intestine, so the danger was real. Or maybe the threat allowed our contestants the creative freedom an event like this demands?

 

 

DAY NINETEEN WINNERS:
1st: Jamie Friedman (Money Talks)
2nd: Dan Reyna (Ware-A-Shirt)
3rd: Travis Moneta (The Assets)

DAY TWENTY: THE DUNK TANK

August 31st. The final event. Staffletes began sneaking out of work early to warm up the ol' throwin' arm, because this event offered a once in a lifetime chance.

 

 

 

 

Athletes stood behind cones and threw softballs at a big red circle. Department heads took turns sitting on the dunk tank seat. A point was awarded every time a boss got dunked, unless someone cheated. And let's be honest, a chance to drop your boss into a tub of water? There was a LOT of cheating.

 

 

Of course, some department heads were a little more serious than others. Buyer John W. brought a tablet computer with him, just to see if it was waterproof (hint: it wasn't) and even the Creative department got into the act.

 

 

That's our very own Jason Toon, winding up to throw the softball at CEO Matt Rutledge. And here's the not safe for the squeamish result of Matt's dunk. On the plus side, now he can honestly say he's put his blood and tears into this company. On the down side, poor Jason felt so guilty.

- BUT WAIT -

Remember how we mentioned the cheating? Well, we had cameras at the ready, and check out what we discovered during the video playback.

 

 

She almost got away with it! Sorry you got the blame at first, Toon. Innocent of all charges, and your sentence is stricken from the record.

 

 

With the exception of poor Matt, all dunkees were treated kindly, and received a monogrammed towel to help them recover from their dive. Final score was determined by number of dunks minus the number of times someone cheated, leaving The Assets in first place with FOUR dunks total. Watch our jobs page as their positions to begin open up later next week.

DAY TWENTY WINNERS:
1st: The Assets
2nd (tie): The Leakfrogs
2nd (tie): Ware-A-Shirt

CLOSING CEREMONIES

 

 

Oohs and ahhhs met the arrival of the Monkey Cup. The same oohs and ahhs that met the arrival of the ice cream truck a few moments before. Let's face it, our staff is pretty easily amused as long as it gets them out of the office for a bit.

 

 

After everyone got a snack, the final medal count was announced. Seattle's Space Needles came in last, with a single Bronze medal and one total point. Next was a tie between once-favorited The Leakfrogs (thirteen medals and twenty three points) and the dual-departmented Ware-A-Shirt (nine medals and twenty three points). Fourth place belonged to The Scarlet Sansas with twenty eight points and thirteen medals, leaving the final three teams to divide the Gold, Silver and Bronze.

FINAL STANDINGS
1st: The Assets 43 points, 14 medals
2nd: Money Talks 41 points, 16 medals
3rd: The Zookeepers 32 points, 15 medals

 

 

Congratulations to The Assets, our 2011 Woot Monkey Games Team Gold Medal Winner! You all did us proud out there. But don't get too cocky, because those other teams have a whole year to practice...

The Woot Monkey Games ran every weekday through all of August and were amazingly fun. Thanks to everyone who participated, especially those who competed at home to win their very own limited edition Woot Games Monkey. And watch for our wrap-up Woot Games podcast, coming soon!

The August 2011 Monkey games may be winding down, but the energy and excitement of our incredible staffletes have shown no signs of stopping, even after three weeks of grueling, "as-long-as-it-doesn't-interfer-with-your-daily-duties" competition. Just a few events remain, office sports fans. Who will feel the burn of scorching defeat and who will end up drenched in the refreshing coolness of VICTORY?

 

 

But before we recap all the thrills of Week Four, we'd like to remind you that can play along at home for a chance to win a specially-made, limited edition 2011 Monkey Games Monkey, along with a t-shirt and Sansa medal! Just click on over to our latest Woot Monkey Games Home Edition Challenge for the full rules and details.

 

 

So are you ready to catch up on all the action? Well, are you, punk?! Read more after the jump!

DAY THIRTEEN: CD TOSS

With pressure building to grab as many points and medals as possible before the closing of the games, we sent our competitors out into the sweltering asphalt desert of the Woot parking lot to see who could throw a CD the farthest.

 

 

 

Turns out that throwing a CD for distance is way harder than you'd think it would be. Many struggled with finding just the right strategy. Some went for power.

 

 

Some went for finesse.

 

 

Some went for... I gotta tell you, I have no idea what John's going for here.

 

 

But in the end, John's crazy throwing mojo won the day, leaving many dreams of winning shattered on the pavement along with the discs. On to the next event!

DAY THIRTEEN WINNERS:

1st: John M. (The Assets)
2nd: Rick B. (The Zookeepers)
3rd: Ryan B.

 

TEAM EVENT: BALLOON TOSS

Egos weren't the only things bursting on day 13. With temperature at 100+, it was time for our staffers to get wet.

 

 

Toss after toss, step after step, our gladiators were forced to use the utmost grace to get the balloon into the hands of their partner or face soggy elimination. The tension had nerves stretched as thin as... Well, a fully filled water balloon, actually.

 

 

Proving once again that he's the guy to go to if you need stuff thrown, John and his partner Dustin picked up another Gold for The Assets as the rest of our teams dried themselves off and prepared for the next day.

TEAM EVENT WINNERS:

1st: The Assets
2nd: Money Talks
3rd: Ware-A-Shirt

DAY FOURTEEN: MUSICAL CHAIRS

 

 

If there's one thing the folks in our front office are good at, it's sitting. At their desks, in their cubicles, or in their cars silently weeping about the ness their lives have become, our employees have proven time and again that they are masters of the craft. But could they perform their most favorite duty under the pressure of randomly paused music? We were all about to find out.

 

 

Look at them. Such savagery. Such fight. Every team's representative was like a feral tiger waiting to pounce on a folding chair gazelle. How any of the losers got out alive, we may never know. But many chairs will tell the story of the horrible carnage of that day to their children, that's for sure.

DAY FOURTEEN WINNERS:

1st: Patricia T. (The Scarlet Sansas)
2nd: Alex S. (The Assets)
3rd: Lisa T. (The Zookeepers)

DAY FIFTEEN: NERF GUN SHOOTOUT

In what was also billed as the "Stress Management" event, the staff took up suction cup-tipped arms and took turns shooting CEO Matt Rutledge in the face. A picture of his face on a target, that is, heh heh.

 

 

Controversy threatened to further fray the nerves of our staffletes during this event. Would a last minute replacement shooter for Team Money Talks be deemed legal? What about the unexpected arrival of a team out of Seattle? And would Melinda of The Zookeepers be allowed to use her own Nerf gun? Tempers flared, but they were kept (mostly) to the competition.

 

 

Darts flew fast and furious, an uncomfortable laughter filling the lobby with every bull’s-eye. The eagle eye of Brian took the Gold, as well as provided a stern warning that he is not to be messed with. Ever.

DAY FIFTEEN WINNERS:

1st: Brian R. (Money Talks)
2nd: Alexis M. (Ware-A-Shirt)
3rd (tie): Melinda M. (The Zookeepers)
3rd (tie): Dan P. (Space Needles)

DAY SIXTEEN: PING PONG TOSS

Is it just me, or has there been a lot of tossing this week? Anyway, for Day 1g, it's Non-alcoholic Drink Pong! All the fun of regular old Beer Pong with none of the nasty "a visit to HR to talk about your problem" side effects! And a few rule changes. But still fun!

 

 

 

Our players were tasked with tossing a ping pong ball into six sups as fast as they could. Without the dulling effects of the sweet amber poison that is beer, that shouldn't be a problem, right?

 

 

Well it certainly wasn't a problem for our three winners. I guess some folks just have more skill at gently and effectively handling small white balls then others.

 

 

DAY FIFTEEN WINNERS:

1st: Phil K. (The LeakFrogs)
2nd: Ben S. (Money Talks)
3rd: Tyler B. (Scarlet Sansas)

DAY SEVENTEEN: SPEED PUZZLES

These games are not all about great feats of strength and dexterity, you know. There's wisdom, intelligence, and a little charisma involved, as well. Everyone got a chance to flex their brain matter for the week's final event, the dreaded Speed Puzzles!

 

 

Having never seen the puzzles before and with no help from teammates, each competitor had to piece together six different puzzles as quickly as their minds would allow. The silence of the meeting area was deafening as each team desperately hoped for a win that might set them further on the path to glory.

 

 

Incredibly, each one of these mental giants was able to keep calm under pressure that would cause a weaker mind to snap in two. Alas, only three can claim the coveted spray-painted Sansa medals, but no one in that room will ever forget the wonders of puzzle solving they witnessed.

 

 

DAY SEVENTEEN WINNERS:

1st: Kelly S. (Scarlet Sansas)
2nd: Stephanie H. (Zookeepers)
3rd: Brian W. (Monkey Talks)

With the last full week of competition over, it's still very close at the top of the leaderboards. Money Talks still has control of the lead with 32 points and 14 medals, but some big wins by The Assets push them into second place with 30 points and 10 medals total. The Zookeepers slipped a bit down to third with 27 points and 13 medals, putting them in striking distance of The Scarlet Sansas at 25 points and 11 medals. But while both The Leakfrogs (18 points and 10 medals) and Ware-A-Shirt (14 points and 6 medals) stay at fifth and sixth, respectively, it's important to remember that these just aren't any games. These are the Monkey Games! Anything can happen in the closing moments! Heck, even Team Space Needles (1 point and 1 medal) can grab a victory! Tune in next week to find out!

The Woot Monkey Games run every weekday through all of August. Check back in this space every Friday for the rest of the summer to see how your favorite team is doing. And don't forget to take your chance to win a special 2011 Woot Games monkey, shirt and medal in this week's Woot Monkey Games Home Edition Thread. Remember, everyone's a winner, but only a few people can be champions!

 

 

Week Four of our August 2011 Monkey Games has come and gone, and the finish line in sight! Our staff continues down the long and sometimes ridiculous road toward office bragging rights destiny, and we've been giving you the opportunity to join them all month long with a chance to win one of the very special, very limited 2011 Monkey Games Monkeys you see below made just for this event! Once they're gone, we won't ever do this batch again. Here's your chance to own a little part of Woot history!

 

 

Now then, before sending you inside for this week's event, we should note our previous challenge is over and done, and the winners have been chosen. Congratulations to the following forum contestants!

RUBBER BAND ARCHERY

1st: epixinc
2nd: FerrisBueller
3rd: colonelpuffpuff

Well done to the medal winners! Email your details (name, address, and shirt size) to commissioner@woot.com and they'll get your prize package sorted out. And for all you non-medal participants, we're still impressed. It took great courage to make those videos, and we won't forget how you sacrificed your dignity for the amusement of others. You've got this one last chance... are you ready to try again?

 

This is your chance to win a Monkey and medal of your very own. Just read the contest rules inside, then post a link to your video in the comments. Here's a little hint about what event you'll be doing this time... think you can guess?

 

 

That's right, this week is Entry Period 4 and you'll be competing in non-alcoholic pong! The short version is that you'll be throwing ping pong balls into six plastic cups as fast as you can. Film yourself and upload the footage to your favorite host-of-choice, then post the link in this thread before Thursday, September 1st at noon, and our judges will make the decision on who gets the medals, the shirts, and the limited edition 2011 Monkey Games monkey. Full rules and legal are right here so be sure to read them carefully before you start... and good luck!

[Finish Line photo credit: jayneandd]

So far two different weeks have passed, but the games aren't over yet. There's been heartbreak and sadness, but also laughter and joy, and our staffletes have made the most of their lunch breaks in the quest to win their team the very highest honors.

 

 

Today's the Week Three Recap, and your chance to catch up on how all the teams have done in this week's competitions. Also remember to take a look at our Woot Monkey Games Home Edition Challenge for full rules and explanation of how YOU can win an EXCLUSIVE one-of-a-kind Woot Games 2011 Monkey (as well as a t-shirt and a Sansa medal). But before you take your turn, jump inside and read about how our staffers did... this week in the 2011 Woot Monkey Games!

 

 

Week Three already? The teams are really feeling the pressure now. It's time for the big push, pulling out all the stops, getting it in gear and dropping mad cliches. This is the week that could make or break those teams close to the top, and the best chance for low-end teams to catch up with the pack.

DAY TEN: RUBBER BAND ARCHERY

Also the event in this week's Monkey Games Home Edition, Rubber Band Archery took place in Downstairs Conference Room Arena. Athletes had to shoot for accuracy and time, because the first to clear all the cups from the table was the winner.

 

 

Five cups and a limitless supply of ammo meant our archers could pick their strategy. Did they aim for the sweet spot with force and try to take one cup with each shot? Or did they rapid-fire short bursts, hoping to drive the cup back first via gentle taps?

 

 

 

Photographers had to move quickly to avoid the ballistic attack. And just like in true archery, the bandmen had to make their decisions quickly. Unlike true archery, the athletes had to wrap it up before lunch break was over, so contestants only had a single heat. But isn't that how archery started? Do or die against the invaders and no second chances? Maybe our method's a bit more traditional than the system those other O-word guys use, hmmm?

 

 

DAY TEN WINNERS:
1st: Brian Woodrick (Money Talks)
2nd: Paul Carpenter (The Leakfrogs)
3rd: Jason Thomas (Ware-A-Shirt)

TEAM EVENT: PICTIONARY

This week's team event- you know what? We all know the rules. Paper on the wall, people yelling guesses, dude with a pen, dude with a timer, there you go.

 

 

 

Teams had 15 minutes to draw as many pictures as they could. When the non-drawers guessed the photo, the artist had to pass the pen so that everyone had a turn to draw. Artists were able to pass the pen early if they felt like miserable failures, but then everyone would know and shame them for it later.

 

 

Teams did very well, for the most part, and who doesn't enjoy Pictionary? Third place was a very exciting and unexpected three way tie, with three teams guessing nine words each, followed by 16 points for second place, and 18 words securing the top team their gold.

 

 

TEAM EVENT WINNERS:
1st: The Zookeepers
2nd: Money Talks
3rd: (tie) The Assets
3rd: (tie) The Leakfrogs
3rd: (tie) The Scarlet Sansas

DAY ELEVEN: MINI GOLF

 

 

Who expected it? The golf event was dominated by the financial departments! Buyers and accountants and CFOs all poured out of their offices to show of their skill on the links. We didn't have a windmill, but we did have some difficult shots.

 

 

Athletes had five shots toward any cup, with the harder shots having larger point values. After five shots, the points were tallied and the highest point value won. With so many golfers on staff, the level of competition was very high, and the audience maintained a respectful and amusing hush during the event. Golf claps were allowed.

 

 

DAY ELEVEN WINNERS:
1st: Chris Klassen (The Leakfrogs)
2nd: Brian Woodrick (Money Talks)
3rd: Derek Chapin (The Assets)

DAY TWELVE: HELICOPTER RACING

 

 

After a short two day break in honor of this week's Woot-Off, competition began again. Athletes used the break to learn their machines inside and out, fusing their minds into the metal and plastic, thus making Thursday the first day in a post-Singularity world.

 

 

Cyborg athletes had to take off from the X and maneuver between the cones, then move in a clockwise direction through the hoops. The final obstacle was an old piece of workout equipment (Watch for it in your next Bag of Crap!) that the helicopter had to fly under to end the circuit. Humans could not step outside the marked middle square, and helicopters had to pass through each hoop before moving on. In the event of a crash, a neutral judge was on hand to make things right and help the little chopper fly again.

 

 

The edges of Upstairs Arena were filled with excited spectators. A small debate raged about whether the air conditioning would affect the race, then a challenge was issued when one of the contestants was suspected of modifying his helicopter on the sly! It turned out that he had tried to get away with it, but that modifications actually led to a crash earlier in the day, and he was forced to use a new one from an unopened box in actual competition. Learn from this, kids, because cheaters never prosper. And fair play is the best play there is.

 

 

The winning time was just over a minute at 1:14, comfortably ahead of second place's 1:45 and third place's 2:04. But even the last place team still got to spend their lunch break flying a tiny helicopter through hoops. And isn't that what victory really means?

 

 

DAY TWELVE WINNERS
1st: Brian Rutherford (Money Talks)
2nd: Chris Pray (The Assets)
3rd: Nathan Fenster (The Leakfrogs)

Some exciting shifts happened in the third week, and the race for top spot is still very very close. Preparing for week four, Money Talks is in first place with 22 points and ten medals, The Zookeepers sit comfortably in second with 21 points and 9 medals, third place belongs to The Assets with 19 points and 7 medals, The Scarlet Sansas are close behind with 18 points and 8 medals, The Leakfrogs made a strong showing to move into fifth with 14 points and 8 medals, and Ware-a-Shirt stands strong with ten points and four medals. Incidentally, Team Ware-A-Shirt has the second highest number of individual gold medals so far, so don't count them out yet! Week Four still lies ahead!

The Woot Monkey Games run every weekday through all of August. Check back in this space every Friday for the rest of the summer to see how your favorite team is doing. And don't forget to take your chance to win a special 2011 Woot Games monkey, shirt and medal in this week's Woot Monkey Games Home Edition Thread. Remember, everyone's a winner, but only a few people can be champions!

 

 

At last! They've arrived at last! Behold our special 2011 Woot Monkey Games Monkey! As you've probably already noticed, our staff has been going nuts for the 2011 Woot Monkey Games, and we want to give all of you a chance to participate at home. That's why, each Friday in August, you've got a chance to win one of the very special, very limited monkeys pictured above. Once they're gone, we won't ever do this batch again. Here's your chance to own a little part of Woot history! But before send you inside for this week's event, we should note our previous two challenges are over and done, and the winners have been chosen. Congratulations to the following forum contestants!

                       PAPER AIRPLANE TOSS          HULA HOOPING
                       1st place: irpip                     1st place: 722lad
                       2nd place: spilzer                 2nd place: epixinc
                       3rd place: sjyokel

Well done to the medal winners! Email your details (edit: like name, address and shirt size) to commissioner@woot.com and they'll get your prize package sorted out. And for all you non-medal participants, we're still impressed. It took great courage to make those videos, and we won't forget how you sacrificed your dignity for the amusement of others. Are you ready to try again?

This is your chance to win a Monkey and medal of your very own. Just read the contest rules inside, then post a link to your video in the comments. Here's a little hint about what event you'll be doing this time... think you can guess?

 

 

That's right, this week is Entry Period 3 and you'll be competing in rubber band archery! The short version is that you'll be trying to shoot five plastic cups off a table as fast as you can. Film yourself and upload the footage to your favorite host-of-choice, then post the link in this thread before Thursday, August 25th at noon, and our judges will make the decision on who gets the medals, the shirts, and the limited edition 2011 Monkey Games monkey. Full rules and legal are right here so be sure to read them carefully before you start... and good luck!

Last Friday we introduced you to the first week of of the 2011 Woot Monkey Games. Competition was fierce and the coveted Sansa Medals inspired our six staff teams to push themselves to the very edge of the limit of what they can do during their lunch breaks.

 

 

And now, at the end of Week Two, we're taking this chance to look back through all the events our athletes have endured in the name of office entertainment. Also remember that you yourself can compete at home each week! Our current contests are The Paper Airplane Toss and The Hula Hoop Endurance Challenge, and full rules of how to win an EXCLUSIVE one-of-a-kind Woot Games 2011 Monkey (as well as a t-shirt and a Sansa medal) are in those threads linked above. But before you go over there, jump inside and read about... this week in the 2011 Woot Monkey Games!

 

 

In Week Two, the events began to get a little more challenging, and the first full team event brought everyone out for an intense Friday afternoon. But the theme of this week seemed to be controversy, and various players began playing towards loopholes instead of in the spirit of the games. Judges were forced to make some hard decisions, and naturally a few teams felt those decisions were incorrect. But that's just part of the sporting life, isn't it?

DAY FIVE: SIMON SAYS

Athletes were judged, quite simply, by if they did what Simon said. From leg-lifts to the National Anthem, medal winners had to prove their mastery of listening to instructions. Think of this as our version of the pentathlon, except maybe a little stranger.

 

 

The Simon Says competition marked the first time spectators did not agree with a judge's call. A player who clearly did not do what Simon said was overlooked and allowed to continue competing. The error didn't change the final medal scores, but it did illustrate just how hard our Monkey Games judges have to work in order to keep things fair... even in a well-known children's game.

 

 

DAY FIVE WINNERS:
1st: Demetrius Tryles (Ware-A-Shirt)
2nd: Matthew Snyder (The Zookeepers)
3rd: Brandy Aslanian (Money Talks)

TEAM EVENT: COFFEE MUG TRIATHLON

Three lanes, two heats, three members from every team. This relay race was for the only most balanced athletes, as winners were judged in two areas: half the points were awarded for speed, and half the points for how much water remained in the cup at the end of the relay.

 

 

 

Lap one required athletes to walk backwards, lap two brought back the racing chairs, and lap three's participant had to finish the race on a scooter. A failure to test chairs for WD-40 opened the door for challenges and a potential anti-stimulant policy for next years games, pending a review by the Monkey Games Committee.

 

 

And as though that wasn't enough excitement, a tie for third meant that four teams were awarded medals. It was pandemonium in Upstairs Stadium! Good thing there was a weekend about to happen so people could relax and move on.

 

 

 

TEAM EVENT WINNERS:
1st: Lauren Mitchel, Alex Smuland, and Barbara Escobedo (The Assets)
2nd: Matthew Riley, Thomas Miller, and Dennis Kam (The Scarlet Sansas)
3rd: (tie) Eric Chappell, Nathan Fenster, and Bobby Zafar (The Leakfrogs)
3rd: (tie) Rick Bryant, Aaron Stephens, and Angelo Moretto (The Zookeepers)

DAY SIX: PIN THE MUSTACHE ON MATT

 

 

Is it cheating to pin the mustache on yourself? Judges ruled no, so Woot CEO Matt Rutledge was allowed to start off the second week by representing his team in this corporatized version of "Pin the Tail on the Donkey". Judges also ruled that spectators were allowed to yell and scream at the athlete, adding an extra level of The Price Is Right-style confusion to the competition.

 

 

Athletes were blindfolded and spun until they were dizzy, then let loose to stick their mustache-of-choice as close to Cardboard Matt's lip as possible. Winners were decided by a quick look at where the mustaches actually ended up.

 

 

Of course, between the spinning and the yelling, it was very easy for athletes to get ridiculously off course. A small exception to the rules was allowed when Matt was surrounded by teammates who helped guide him to his own image on the wall.

 

 

C'mon, he pays our salaries, cut us some slack on this one. And anyway he still only came in second.

DAY SIX WINNERS:
1st: Thomas Miller (The Scarlet Sansas)
2nd: Matt Rutledge (The Zookeepers)
3rd: Paul Carpenter (The Leakfrogs)

DAY SEVEN: HULA HOOPING

The Hula Hoop event was open to all genders, naturally... but do you see any men in these photos?

 

 

Our first all-female event was an endurance challenge, with contestants hooping it up for as long as they were able. The winning time was slightly over five minutes, which is pretty impressive for non-stop hula hooping. Maybe next year some brave guy will step up and give it a shot, but for now, the ladies hold all the titles. And remember, Hula Hooping is this week's Woot Monkey Games Home Competition, so check out the rules to submit your video and maybe you can win a special limited edition Woot 2011 Monkey Games Monkey!

 

 

DAY SEVEN WINNERS
1st: Laura Storm (Money Talks)
2nd: Sarah Chisty (The Leakfrogs)
3rd: Kim Hefley (The Scarlet Sansas)

DAY EIGHT: WII SUPER MARIO RACING

 

 

Let's face it, when you sit down to play a driving game next to a guy wearing his own helmet, the psych-out factor is already turned up a notch. But mind games didn't stop our athletes from driving head-to-head through Living Room Canyon in an attempt to win the gold.

 

 

The contestants just had to win a full cup tournament in Wii Mario Kart. Cheating was pretty much impossible so most of the anger ended up directed at poorly-timed turtle shells or controllers that absolutely HAD to be broken (you gamers know how that goes, right?) Athletes played head-to-head across three televisions, racing through randomly selected worlds, and the final cup standings on the screen determined the medal ranks. Computer controlled drivers were not eligible for an award, and anyone caught throwing the controller in anger was disqualified.

 

 

DAY EIGHT WINNERS
1st: Thomas Williams (Ware-A-Shirt)
2nd: Dennis Wai-Hao Kam (The Scarlet Sansas)
3rd: (tie) Ryan Pulis (Money Talks)
3rd: (tie) Aaron Stephens (The Zookeepers)

DAY NINE: TRASH CAN BASKETBALL

 

 

Ever played H-O-R-S-E? Well, then, you've got a handle on the rules for our W-O-O-T game of Trash Can Basketball. Contestants drew numbers to choose the first shot, and if it went in, everyone had to copy it or step aside. Rounds continued until everyone was eliminated or ranked, and Woot Games Committee member Alex stood in as the placemarker to make sure everyone shot from the same location. Just think, other companies would have used a simple piece of tape!

 

 

DAY NINE WINNERS
1st: John Mahalik (The Assets)
2nd: Pat Skelly (The Zookeepers)
3rd: Paul Carpenter (The Leakfrogs)

At the end of the first week, The Scarlet Sansas have moved into first with sixteen points and seven medals. The Zookeepers are in second place with 15 points but eight total medals, The Assets are in third with 14 points and four medals, leaving Money Talks with ten points and six medals, Ware-A-Shirt with nine points and three medals, and The Leakfrogs are at last on the board with six points and four total medals. The space between first and second is pretty close, but with the heavily anticipated helicopter races coming up next week, who can say who'll take the lead? Expect some shifting as we reach the halfway point of these games. The best might still be yet to come!

The Woot Monkey Games run every weekday through all of August. Check back in this space every Friday for the rest of the summer to see how your favorite team is doing. And don't forget to take your chance to win a special 2011 Woot Games monkey, shirt and medal in our Woot Monkey Games Home Edition Threads. Remember, everyone's a winner, but only a few people can be champions!

 

 

As you've probably already noticed, our staff has been going nuts for the 2011 Woot Monkey Games, and we want to give all of you a chance to participate at home. That's why, each Friday in August, we'll be giving you a chance to win one of the very special 2011 Monkey Games Monkeys. They're limited and dated and once they're gone, we won't ever do this batch again. Here's your chance to own a little part of Woot history! Our first community challenge is still open or you can give today's a shot in this thread! Just read the contest rules, then post a link to your video in the comments. Here's a little hint about what event you'll be competing in this time... think you can guess?

 

 

That's right, this week is Entry Period 2 and you'll be competing in the Hula Hoop Endurance Challenge! The short version is that you'll be grabbing a hula hoop and going for as long as you can. Film yourself and upload the footage to your favorite host-of-choice, then post the link in this thread before Thursday, August 18th at noon, and our judges will make the decision on who gets the medals, the shirts, and the limited edition 2011 Monkey Games monkey. Full rules and legal are right here so be sure to read them carefully before you start... and good luck!

 

 

 

As you've probably already noticed, our staff has been going nuts for the 2011 Woot Monkey Games, and we want to give all of you a chance to participate at home. That's why, each Friday in August (except for last Friday - blame the lawyers), we'll be giving you a chance to win one of the very special 2011 Monkey Games Monkeys. They're limited and dated and once they're gone, we won't ever do this batch again. Here's your chance to own a little part of Woot history! Just head inside, read the contest rules, and post a link to your video in the comments of this thread. Here's a little hint about what you'll be doing...

 

 

You guessed it, for Entry Period 1 you'll be competing in a paper airplane contest! The short version is that you'll be making and throwing a plane, and being judged on design style and the time the plane stays in the air. Film yourself and upload the footage to your favorite host-of-choice, then post the link in this thread before Thursday, August 18th at noon, at which point our judges will make the decision on who gets the medals, the shirts, and the limited edition 2011 Monkey Games monkey. Gold, Silver and Bronze will be awarded, and full rules and legal are right here so be sure to read them carefully before you start. Then, once you've done that, print it out and fold it up and throw it away... good luck!

 

It's an oddity in the human condition, but nothing brings us closer than competition. The rush of excitement, the release of strong emotions, learning what to do better and from whom you can learn, it's almost Fight Club-like, isn't it? Except the boss told us specifically that we had to stop punching each other at work, so this year, we've got to do something different.

 

 

That's not from our podcast team, it's a little video from Zach, one of our return techs, and he made it in his own free time. When's the last time YOU felt like giving up your day off to do some unrequested video editing work? That alone should help you understand the level of excitement tied to the 2011 Woot Monkey Games, an August-long company-wide competition.

 

 

Under the watchful eye of our mascot/cardboard CEO, staff has divided into six teams who'll be going head-to-head for about fifteen minutes during each lunch hour. Each Friday we'll sum up the week on our blog, telling you a bit about the events and the behind-the-scenes drama. We'll also give you a chance to participate at home each week, via video submissions, to win a special one-time-only Woot Monkey that we're never going to sell. Watch for the rules and your chance to enter the first contest a little later today! (EDIT: By later today we apparently meant the top of next week. Watch for our announcement once the lawyers give us the okay!) But for now, relax and get ready to enjoy some friendly competition, because here comes this week in... The 2011 Woot Monkey Games!

 

...and you can read all about them inside. Sorry if we weren't clear.

The Woot Monkey Games were designed to be a fun way to help our employees enjoy the scorching month of August, and so far, response has been huge. Every department has gotten involved in the attempt to win glory for the team and a gold-painted Sansa medal for themselves.

 

 

This week, office athletes were fresh and full of energy, and so ready to play hard. The Monkey Game Committee chose five solid events to start things off right.

DAY ONE: OFFICE CHAIR RACES

Like the first day of that other popular multi-day sports event with lawyers who protect their trademark constantly, the opening of the Woot Games was slightly under-attended. But that didn't stop a few departmental cheerleaders from coming out to beautiful Upstairs Arena to support their players.

 

 

Chair athletes started from the back wall and had to race to the other side of the room. Kicking was freestyle and the winner was determined by who touched the wall first. However the athletes apparently had mixed ideas about if they were going between the cones dash-style or around the cones slalom-style.

 

 

That grey area led to a controversy which threatened to pull the judges apart until they kinda accepted it didn't really matter and called the whole thing fair. And anyway, what's a contest without controversy? The drama's part of the fun!

DAY ONE WINNERS:
1st: Dennis Kam (The Scarlet Sansas)
2nd: Dustin Sayre (The Assets)
3rd: Todd Davenport (Money Talks)

DAY TWO: POPSICLE EATING CONTEST

 

 

On Tuesday each team sent their very strongest eaters to Upstairs Arena, the willful men and women most likely to push through an ice-pop headache. This event was seven minutes long, although athletes were allowed a little extra time to lie down and recover after the competition ended. Top honors were given to the athlete who ate the most without crying. Not everyone made it through unscarred.

 

 

 

 

Turnout on this day was heavy, possibly because people like to see their co-workers in pain. Lax security meant non-competitors were able to approach the table and begin to warm ice pops with their hands, a decision that changed the game almost immediately. Innovation or cheating? Let us know your opinions in the comments below.

 

 

In total a whopping 78 popsicles were consumed, and spectators witnessed a historic moment in the Woot Monkey Games... our very first tie for the gold between two titans of dessert, each sucking down 19 popsicles in the seven minutes allotted. Pretty sweet, right?

 

 

DAY TWO WINNERS:
1st: Mark Hare (The Zookeepers)
1st: Robert Baron (Money Talks)
3rd: Tyler Buschman (The Scarlet Sansas)

DAY THREE: MONKEY TOSS

 

 

This was the view from the stairs at our first Lobby event on Wednesday. Spectators were kept at a safe distance so as not to disrupt the concentration of the archers. This game was point-based, and even included customer service legend Kristy Tye as a moving target with the highest point value.

 

 

Archers had the option of playing it safe and building up small point totals or going for the huge shots and risking it all. Tragically most of the archers were also really bad at shooting, and it took a full five rounds before anyone got some points.

 

 

But when all was said and done, it was gold for the Team Ware-A-Shirt, putting a combination of shirt workers and our loyal warehouse team on the board at last. Could this be the beginning of a trend?

 

 

DAY THREE WINNERS
1st: Elena Torres (Ware-A-Shirt)
2nd: Bob Miller (The Scarlet Sansas)
3rd: Sallyann Alicea (The Zookeepers)

DAY FOUR: PAPER AIRPLANE TOSS

 

 

Here it was. The first real A-level challenge. Tensions ran high around this event as the competitors spent days searching for the design that might give them the edge. Cross-team espionage was rampant and teams began meeting in secret to research prototype planes. In the final hour before the competition, our halls were littered with folded paper. Clearly, the plane toss was going to be an event that would challenge even the most supple of wrists.

 

 

Athletes were given regulation printer paper and allowed five minutes to fold their plane, though the long training period meant everyone finished folding in three. These pilots knew the designs inside and out! But the real test lay head. It wasn't just engineering that would win the day. It would be the human element.

 

 

Athletes stood behind the tiny cones and tossed their plane forward toward the wall. Judging was on distance and distance alone. Each athlete had the option of three throws, but only their final throw would count for the scoring. It took a steady hand to guide each winners into medal position, and yes, there was heartbreak from those who missed the podium by inches.

 

 

DAY FOUR WINNERS
1st: Chris Pray (The Assets)
2nd: Keegan Carson (The Zookeepers)
3rd: Laura Storm (Money Talks)

At the end of the first week, The Zookeepers and The Scarlet Sansas are both tied for first among the teams with six points and three medals each. The Assets and Money Talks are tied for second with five points and two to three medals, Ware-A-Shirt are at three points, and The Leakfrogs have yet to score. Today's events, Simon Says and the Coffee Mug Triathlon, will be occurring after press time and we'll be covering them in next week's update. It's still anybody's Monkey Games, and who knows what upsets are coming? Can't you feel the excitement building?

The Woot Monkey Games run every weekday through all of August. Check back in this space every Friday for the rest of summer to see how the teams are doing. And watch for your chance to win a special Woot Games monkey next week, as soon as we get the rules back from Legal. Remember, everyone's a winner, but only a few people can be champions!